Tuesday, January 4, 2011

2011: Hello!

2011 is going to be a big year for me. C and I will be getting married in July. We will probably be moving - the place has yet to be decided. I took the GRE right before Christmas and am considering the options for grad school.

The excitement has actually already begun, as I quit my job as of the end of December and have embarked with C. on a cross-country journey to live for a couple months in Arizona. We are in Virginia at the moment, having spent the holidays with his family here.

This was my first Christmas away from my family and I expected awkwardness, homesickness, and general feelings of woe; but C's family is so affectionate and have taken me in so warmly that I didn't feel out of place at all. I think that's a good sign as we will most likely be celebrating many more holidays together in the future!

As always whilst on vacation - and even more so with the New Year and all the attending expectations of change and resolve - my mind turns toward possibilities and plans for the future. Right now this potential is magnified by the very real need to replace my forsaken income (what was I thinking! - is what I ask my self quite frequently) and my own internal insistence on figuring out just what the hell I want to do with my life. I am still adjusting to a suspicion that growing up does not mean acquiring an automatic knowledge of grown up information (how to decide on an insurance plan, for instance, or what exactly is a realistic savings goal for two basically unemployed twenty-somethings).

After my first euphoria at being on the road - literally as well as figuratively - the worries began to creep in. Or to be honest, they hit me square on the head as I attempted to fall asleep. What are we doing? What am I doing? I had a fantastic job in a time when so many are searching without luck for any type of employment. My accessible savings are quite limited and I have no game plan for the immediate future as far as paying bills. The relaxation of the holidays has now passed and I am beginning to feel that I am just being lazy. Sleeping late and watching Parks and Recreation until mid-afternoon is great and all, but doesn't help my pocketbook. I am loaded with ideas on what I want to do next, but there is a necessary waiting period involved with our travel plans. I am starting to get antsy.

However. Right now, I am sitting in an incredibly comfortable chair with a mug of delicious coffee, next to a cozy fire in my future-mother-in-law's lovely home. I have so many people - my family and C's family and our amazing friends - in my life. I have a head brimming with creativity and a drive to make something of myself and my world in some way. I have a lot to figure out this year, but ever so much to look forward to.



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